Been in and out of love. Or so I thought. I am no expert and I cannot boast of any psychological training about love and relationships. But I have experienced enough. Name any kind, I might have been soaked on it for long; some of which I might have dipped a foot just to test the waters.
And to say that every experience is either a blessing or a lesson is already cliché. For the most part, I still believe it is, but I also know that when a similar happy feeling comes around, we are still bound to commit the same. No hiding. No escaping. We still face it head-on.
No breakup is a happy ending. Blessing when it ends more nicely. Lesson when it ends leaving a part of us still questioning what happened back there. When you are in search for answers to questions in your mind, and you end up answering them all because there’s nobody else to give an excuse after excuse, a reason after reason.
Maybe we never really learn at all. Or maybe we had the lesson in us all along. Either way, we make our choices. Whether acceptable or not to the societal standards, we just don’t give a damn.
Not because we have a broken, out-of-order conscience but because we make it a choice to break and go with the flow of its brokenness. Because we oftentimes choose what makes us happy. At least at the start. But almost always, something inevitably just messes it up. And we go back to a messier state than before everything has all started.
When we have all the choices in the beginning, we get left with one choice in the end–to suck it up.